Off-Road Fiasco

So I promised a post about the Off-Road Adventure that took Hubby and Kaia into the wee hours of the morning... 4am to be exact. Here are a few pix to help tell the story.

Wednesday night Ben got a call from his buddy to go help recover a Ranger from out at the glacier (20 mile off-road trip). Apparently, the guy tried crossing the river in a bad place and his rig floated downstream and flipped.
The guy offered $1600 to fetch it, so off they go into the night only to return at 4am with mud-covered rigs and NO Ranger. Not to mention the fact that my kid comes back wearing nothing but a diaper to her knees (clearly not changed all day), a peanut butter/sand concoction all over her face and a crazy hairdo like she's coming off a 2-day crack binge! And sure, that is the perfect example of a snuggle buddy honey, throw her right in between the sheets just like she is!

Well, we recovered from Wednesday and had planned to make a family camping trip out of it this weekend. Unfortunately, the kids got sick... throw-up sick... and I thought it irresponsible to take them out in the rain for hours on end while the boys try again to recover this rig. Though I was really looking for a way to feel okay about being irresponsible, I couldn't do it. So Ben went without us, and had a great time wheelin' around in the mud.
Anyway, long story getting longer, Ben went back out there and swamped our jeep... AGAIN! I have decided that it is a "Family Recreation" activity and I need to be there to keep Hubby from turning wheels-up in the river too. Here's the picture that had me questioning my hubby's judgment. What gets me is the expression on our dog's face with water only inches from the bottom of the window... in a lifted jeep on 35" tires! That water must have been a good 4 feet deep! UGH!
The good news is that they were able to recover the Ranger, the damage is minimal and Ben already has practice pulling out the upholstery in that rig as this is the second time he has swamped it. Even better news is that now we have some extra cash and all the parts to put a snorkel on the jeep so we don't have to run the risk of permanent engine damage. So far, we have been really lucky, but our luck will run out sometime and I just want to be prepared as possible.

All I gotta say is that I would have been furious if Ben had pulled that crap with me and my babies in the rig. I'm still a little ticked that he swamped it the first time with me and Kaia in the rig nearly 2 years ago... and I'm not even a grudge holder. I guess things could have been a lot worse and I should be grateful.

A Really Tough Place

So here is a dilemma that has been on my mind for a few days and I thought I would put it out there in the blog sphere for some feedback. As many of you are like-minded mommies, this is a really tough spot to be in, and I would like your advice.

Since I was a little girl, I believed in the concept of "starting over." We moved around a lot and as part of my mom's attempt to help us cope, she taught me that it was an opportunity to learn from my mistakes and go to a new place where nobody would know about them. It was a beautiful concept in line with my Christian upbringing, and I really liked the idea of a "clean slate."

As I got older and made bigger and bigger mistakes, I learned that the "clean slate" concept is a really tough place to get to when everyone is throwing it back in your face. I guess that is part of the reason I get so excited about the big scary adventures like the one that brought me to the last frontier. In my experience, I learned to forgive and forget. Move on from the mistakes made and learned from and accept everyone despite their past.

For a long time, I didn't know or associate with anyone that challenged that way of being in the world. But that all ended recently when an ex-con requested membership in our off-road club. It was an issue brought up in a club meeting and was handled pretty delicately. This man made some really bad decisions for about 5 years and created a really big mess for himself. Fortunately, there is no criminal history past 1999, but his past is something that concerns me when deciding weather or not to accept him into our group.

I guess I don't have enough information and am in a tough place of knowing that it really isn't my business to know the details... I probably don't want to know the details anyway, but for the safety of my children, I need to know what this guy did to get a "sexual abuse of a minor second degree" felony under his belt. It sounds awful, but it could be that he was 18 with a 15 year old girlfriend. Unfortunately, I'm thinking he was in his 30's when he was charged and found guilty so that "best case scenario" is a bit far fetched.

With cases like this, I've heard that criminals of this nature cannot be rehabilitated. No amount of time in prison will "cure" them of their impulses, and despite how much he may want to, he can't learn from his mistake and never repeat it again.

If that is really the case I won't put my children at risk for that. What is worse is that despite how much I would want to forgive him and let him have his "clean slate" with me, a complete stranger to him, I don't want to be on guard every time he is around. I don't want to wonder what kind of horrible things he has done and completely forget about the fact that he has paid his debt to society and is trying to start over just as I have done many times.

Had it been anything else, Robbery, Grand Theft Auto, even Domestic Violence or a DUI resulting in a death would be something I could get over. But this is not something that has been proven to be a one-time gig with any offender, and I do perceive a real threat to the safety of my baby girls, even though I don't know the details.

There may come a time when the club will make a motion to vote this guy into our group, and I am at a loss as to how best to handle it. My comment to the club was that "so long as my children aren't at risk, I think we should give this guy a chance." The problem is that knowing now that my children may very well be at risk, I don't want to give this guy a chance to hurt them. That instinct is much stronger than my intention to give him a chance for a clean slate.

I guess the question is What would you do?

Landscaping: Alaska Style

They say everything is bigger and badder in AK, and I think that they might be right. At least I'm sure the mosquitoes are bigger and badder. For the first time in months, I have been feeling up to getting my hands dirty. I spent a good 4 hrs digging in the dirt, moving around rocks and stumps and salvaging the flowers in the plow zone.

Ben rented a dozer to level out our land for our addition and the landscaping plan for our new back yard... which is to be fenced for child and canine containment ASAP! Right now, the property is a giant gravel site. But at least it is flat and we have eliminated the low spots that proved to be mud bogs during this year's break up (Alaskan for spring). There are some things that just need to be done, and I consider this one of them. It did cost us a pretty penny to get everything rented, delivered and sorted out... and the gravel wasn't cheap either.

The concept is good, but the process is MESSY. I think it will be a better use of our acre and will allow us to increase the property value, or at least resale-ability to have it be more kid-friendly. Most of the materials are here already, and I think we can make it really nice for about $4000 including fencing, grass and this weeks extensive excavating. Although it has been a TON of work, I think it has been pretty fun for all of us. I really enjoyed getting outside even though I'm a little sore from attacking it a bit harder than I should have this close to the c-section.

Gotta love the home improvement projects. Especially the long-term continuous projects... much like the kitchen, which, buy the way, got the trim put on last weekend. YAY! Things are finally coming together... Now for the big addition!

(Ben and Kaia pushin' da Dirt)

(Kaia, takin' a break, and yes, those are real Carhart coveralls, work gloves and her favorite rain boots that she never takes off. It's also a real wheelbarrow and roll of TP... strange combo, I know, but they all serve very important roles in a project like this.)

(Kaia and Nui ready to go play hard after a hard day's work... don't worry yall, I stayed home with the baby, and good thing 'cause they didn't get back till 4am! But that is a story for another post because that saga will continue this weekend.)