Saturday, March 29, 2008

I'm a Princess!

This was pretty fun, and I can really relate to the results.

You Are Pocahantas!
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Free-spirited and wise. You have a strong passionate spirit that touches and changes all who know you. The wisdom and common sense that you have is really what guides you through life. Even so, you also have a very playful side that loves adventure and excitement.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

Stuff That Matters, and More That Doesn't

So, I read Tolle's book A New Earth and discovered a few things about myself that I didn't know... well, I guess I DID know, just wasn't quite aware of them. I catch myself now when my temper flares and it is really weird. I know I am feeling angry, I hear the angry tone in my voice, and It's almost like an out of body experience.

Today for example, Kaia pooped on the floor. Once for Ben, which didn't really affect me in anyway. We then changed 3 poopy diapers between us and then she pooped on the floor again for me! All I could do was scream "NOOOOOooooooo!" To which Kaia replied "Oh NOOOOooooo!" as if she hadn't been the culprit of this domestic dissaster. And I repeated "NOOOOoooooo!" To which she repeated "Oh NOOOooooo!" You can see how none of this changed the fact there there was a stinky terd on the floor. Really, I should be grateful she tells me about it. I would hate to find one of those surprises on my own by accident... that would really make me mad.

Anyway, I still fight the angry words and actions I naturally want to spew out into the universe, and I still fail to stop them. The difference is that now I actually hear and see my crazy behavior, and it is really commical. The interesting thing is that with this realization, I don't feel guilty anymore. I have my tantrum, repair any damages and reflect. But really, in the heat of the moment, I'm beginning to find it entertaining, to see the drama and know that I am still passionate about... well, dumb stuff for no good reason.

I really spend a lot of energy on things that don't really matter, and being aware of that is changing the way I respond to almost everything. Even when I don't change habits or behavior immediately, the way I feel about it is already revolutionized. It's a wild transformation, and I am really starting to get a kick out of it.

On another note, I realized in all this self awareness, that I am throwing a pitty party for myself. I am NOT what most would call a happy pregnant woman... actually, I'm pretty far from it. Deep down, I feel hi-jacked. I feel a sacrifice and burden that "entitles" me to all the things I don't need and can't afford. The biggest being junk food. Yes, I know, financially it's not really all that big of a deal, but psychologically and physically, it is taking a HUGE toll on me. I have let my fitness goals slide... well more like hurl down to the depths of hell in a bucket of ice cream and girl scout cookies.

In all logic, I am sabbotaging my real goals and blaming it on the most innocent part of me. I am telling myself a lie in the hopes to justify something ugly... self abuse in the name of instant gratification. Great! Now I have identified the stink, the trick is getting it out. I'm not so sure that Tolle has it all figured out that the more you are aware of yoru true issue, the more it goes away. I guess we shall see if the weight gain has reached it's peak, or if we are just getting started. I think I could use some good tools to help me cope and pamper myself a little better.

My big plan:
Go see mom! She just turned 50 and asked to see her grandbaby as a gift. I'm pretty sure it is going to be a bigger gift for me than for her, but I'll let her believe it is all about grandma. I will get some great time off, get some fun new spring-maternity clothes and take her to the spa for a pedicure. THAT will be nice. Not to mention the fact that there is grass and warmth and beautiful flowers all abloom in my P-town of Oregon. IT WILL BE FABULOUS!!!

The 2 weeks that are normally spent feeling extra sorry for myself and coping as a single parent will be spent shopping and visiting with my best girlfriend, getting to relax while Kaia has endless grandma entertainment and tasty meals that I don't have to plan, shop for, prepare or clean up. I don't think I can think of a better treat than this... and it's all paid for! Gotta love air miles.

Unfortuntately, I've got a laundry list of things to do before we can get outta here. FIRST is getting that damn kitchen done... Yup, you guessed it... still not finished. What I thought would be a 3-day deal has now developed into the 12 days of chaos. The good news is that our plans to be done are realistic now that we are so close. We even picked out floors... to be done in another month, but on the timeline no less.

Now for the big confession. I've got huge plans for the house that I haven't quite squared with Ben yet. The big kahuna of the 500 ft, 2-bedroom addition with covered porch and arctic entry have been hinted, and tossed around as a maybe. But I have plans to get the ball rolling before we leave in 5 days.

Yup, that is going to knock him for a loop. I already got the quotes, figured out the financing and fit it all into a budget and a timeline. It IS doable, I just gotta show him the numbers and submit the application for the building permit. I think I will let Ben choose the contractor and I'm hoping to schedule construction to begin the beginning of May... wish me luck!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Still No News

So we had our ultrasound today. I guess everything looked fine... except for the one thing we couldn't see. I can't believe how uncooperative our little guy is... maybe he is a gal... we don't know yet. They guessed a girl becuase his legs were crossed. But that was followed by a "well, I can't even give it a 60% chance of being one way or the other." So we are still hoping for a boy. We will post pix as soon as we get our scanner hooked up.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

De-Stressing Meme

Nicci Tagged me at Smile, Play Dream for Five ways you like to de-stress, relax, wind down or kick back." So here goes.

  1. When Ben is home, put the kiddo to bed early!
  2. Play with dog and kiddo outside. (any temp above 40 is perfect.)
  3. Blogging and catching up with fam and friends.
  4. Head out on a hiking adventure just about anywhere.
  5. Watching Nature out my living room window. (I especially like the birds, squirrels, moose, snow falling, melting or blowing in chunks off the big trees… yes, it's true, we STILL have snow.)

I tag Kimmy P. at Ex Libris Lady, Cousin Kimmy at A Million Moments and Cousin Karin at Short and Sweet.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Big Projects and MORE BOXES!

I am SO EXCITED!!! Our new kitchen cabinets have arrived. With any luck I will be using a dishwasher by Monday. I never realized the beauty of such a simple machine, but I gotta tell ya, a year of washing by hand has given me a great deal of appreciation. It will be fantastic, and I can hardly wait.

The cabinets look awesome and I am thrilled that they will give us the accommodations that we really need in the kitchen. We were working with a 20" stove and limited cupboard space. It is only a 10x10 space, but we can really maximize it with an island stove and help meet code with a really nice custom hood/vent. It is going to look amazing. I pulled out one of the pieces and it matches the other trim and woodwork beams in the rest of the space.

Unfortunately, the beautiful new cabinets are still in their boxes, and the old ones are cluttering up my front porch. I think we will be able to sell them though. I posted em up on craigslist and had 3 people stop by to take a peek. We shall see if they can get them out of here by Monday... THAT would be great!

So here is the picture of the kitchen before the big project. We will be upgrading everything including the kitchen sink... which wasn't bad to begin with, but we wanted the corian built in sink so we don't get gunk in the seams. The whole upgrade will only cost us about $1000 because of the insurance money. We will also be upgrading the floors (was lenoleum before the flood).
I will definitely put up after pictures once we get there. But here is a cute one of part of the process. We are about 1/2 way through the project now and I don't have the heart to tell Ben that we are going to start on the other part of the remodel (adding 2 rooms above the garage) as soon as we're done with the kitchen gear. He is working so hard and I think it is actually good for him to have something to do when he is home. At least something that is going to have a product when complete.Ayway, it was quite the ordeal getting to this phase. First we had to pick out the colors and style and price everything out. Then we waited 6 weeks for them to arrive and barely got the hot tub out of the converted garage before they arrived. That was a project! We ended up using 2 jeeps, a buddies trailer that wasn't quite wide enough to accommodate the hot tub, a couple of wood planks, the winch (a mechanical device used to wind up a rope, not a hooker) a couple of ratcheting tie downs, a tow strap or two, a come-along, a big tree, and some good-old-fashioned muscle to get it from the garage to the deck out front. Here are a few pictures of that fiasco.

Getting the hot tub out of the garage.*****
Getting the hot tub onto the little deck (temporary storage till we get the addition on.)

I gotta say that I am impressed with Ben's ingenuity. I don’t think I would have been able to do that… at least not without calling in the brigade. I did help, but only to the extent that he told me exactly what to do and when to do it.

Ya know, I just realized that I didn’t mind that. I must confess that I was eager to be bossed around, at least it made me feel useful. Surprisingly, we haven’t fought at all during this stressful remodel. We have been able to work together and neither of us have been really frustrated… although, we can see why carpenters drink. It is a little more stressful than we had anticipated.

Anyway, that is the bulk of our projects for the weekend. I will definitely keep yall posted on the progress and new plans for improvements. Fun? Fun. FUN!

Monday, March 17, 2008

I Haven't Decieded If It's Annoying Yet

So I've been reading this Eckart Tolle book about being consious. This has been kind of a theme for the past few years for me and I feel that I am comming out of the borg of just doing things to do them. I don't get upset as often or as extremely as I used to, and I am aware of how awesome my adventure really is... most of the time.

With this in mind, I am listening to the ceaseless chirping and squaking of a flirtatious squirrel couple. I don't know if it's the twitterpation of the season, the fact that Nui (our dog) is fascinated with their foreplay or if it is just a freakin' annoying habit I am going to have to deal with all summer.

In all my "enlightenment" I am trying to appreciate the beauty of life and nature that this little squirrel represents. At first it was awesome. Kaia got such a kick out of them. She decided that squirrel is too hard to say and that monkey fit the description better. With all the racket they produce... with squeeks and squaks and chirps, it could very well sound like a monkey. So I let her think that we have pet monkeys, what is it going to hurt?

Anyway, now, it is not so awesome. It is actually quite distracting. It's nice to wonder the whys of the cosmos, but when ya gotta do taxes, or return important e-mails, it just seems to get in the way... actually, I would rather visit with the squirrel than do either of those things, but allas, I must finish taxes and the e-mails are for the greater good of our household... I really want to remodel before the baby gets here.

So, it comes down to this: I haven't decided if it is annoying or not. Funny how this new way of thinking makes it harder to make up your mind, form an opinion or even get behind a cause. I'm still passionate... but now I'm schitzo! I either love that squirrel or I hate it... depending on what I am trying to acomplish.

Thursday, March 6, 2008

A Mini Vacation

Sorry all for the lack of posts lately, I've been really distracted with a new book... I know, weird considering I don't really read, but this one was good. I'll post more about it after I take the couse and understand it a little better.

Now for the Hunsaker Happenings. We spent the last week up in Fairbanks visiting friends we knew from Barrow. IT WAS AWESOME! Although, I must say that I am really glad that we have chosen to live down here closer to Anchorage. I just think it fits our lifestyle a bit better.

The drive up was pretty uneventful, although we did see a few moose and had to make a few more stops than expected for the puppy to go tinkle. Upon arrival we were given a grand tour of our friends new place and had a great time visiting with our friends. Everyday was a new adventure. The fist day was a trip to the ice park, which was amazing. I can't believe what people do with just water and a few tools. I'll have to post more pix later, but for now, this is all I have.

Here I am at the park enterance.

Here's Kaia getting a kick out of the ice octopus gym (sorry, no pixs of the actual octopus, just inside it's tentacles.)
They had all these great theme slides for the kids...

...and a few bigger slides for the bigger kids.
I only wish we could have seen it at night when all the lights are on the ice. The only problem was that it was plenty cold in the middle of the day... I guess that is how the park stays open and so spectacular for so long. I'm sure the sculptures wouldn't make it down here with the temperatures we've been having.

We tried to visit the large animal reserve, but they were closed for the season, but we did visit the North Pole and got to see some reindeer up close. On the way back to our friends house we were also lucky enough to see a fox catch a mouse out on the river. It was pretty neat.

We were treated every morning to possibly the best coffee I have ever had, and the lates were spectacular! Maybe it is because it has been so long since I actually allowed myself to enjoy one, maybe it is because I'm pregnant, maybe it's because they weren't loaded with all that sugar and artificial flavor ya get from the coffee shops. I don't know, but it was really good, and we really felt that we were treated to a good time.

We took a different route home... I know, the mind baffles at the possibility that there are more highways to nowhere and back. But it was really nice to get a different view. I think the Parks is definitely faster, but the Richardson is definitely more spectacular. We saw more moose, the pipeline, amazing mountains and a great river valley, glaciers and even a small herd of caribou. It was great!

Thanks Greenwoods for a fabulous time. We all had a blast and are looking forward to having you down when Ben gets his leave.