Just when I think my life is too boring and my thoughts too blah for post-worthy materials, I get an experience like tonight. Hubby and I were headed into bed with one of those weird conversations about body smells. He mentioned something about his smelly ass and I made some comment about my stinky pits. We were discussing whether our stinks could wait till the morning when my hubby interrupted that powerful thought with an apology.
He said “Sorry Honey” then let one rip! At first I was appalled that he would have the nerve to apologize before he made the offense. He is just like our daughter and her “ut-ohs” it’s just not sincere if you apologize before you intentionally drop something… especially if it is as offensive as a Daddy Fart! Anyway, just as we were laughing about that ironic parallel, he got very serious and threw the covers over my head.
I couldn’t believe it; not only did he have the nerve to blow it up, but he was actually going to try to magnify the offense with a covered wagon! I don’t remember how the conversation went from here, but apparently he was “protecting me” from his green fog funk that was wafting my way. The covers weren’t intended to keep it in, but to shield me from it’s toxic powers… Now, who said chivalry is dead?
Our conversation drifted to something else and we began our normal nightly routine. I tossed around a bit and tugged at covers and pillows while Hubby scratched and rolled over. Just as I was getting comfortable, there it was. Hubby reached his arm over me to snuggle up and the most atrocious smell was right there in my face. “Oh, tell me that wasn’t the hand you were just scratching your ass with!” Sure enough it was, unmistakably o’ de Hubby. Needless to say, we unanimously decided on the shower before bed option. So there you have it folks, chivalry is alive and well in the Hunsaker household.
2 comments:
Hahah EEWW!! And a covered wagon? We always called it a dutch oven, haha! Farting is one thing that Jordon and I don't do around each other... don't know why. I think we both know that if we started, we would NEVER stop!
Also, does your husband have family in Portland? I worked with a guy with the same last name. Now wouldn't THAT be a small world...
Too funny! I fart around everyone but my hubby if I can help it. One time I farted under the covers while he was in the bathroom. What I didn't realize was that the fart smell was contained under the covers so when he lifted the covers he got a stinky surprise. I was so embarrassed!
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